Jessica Simpson Annouces Her New Fragrance “I Fancy You”

Finally a perfume that even I can enjoy!  I mean, who wouldn't want to huff deep breaths of a perfume that's called I Fancy You?  You know what I fancy?  Not Jessica Simpson!  I mean I used to think she was hot with all the right curves.  Now I realize she is stuck in the dark ages.  Who say's "I fancy you" anymore?  Anybody?  Can anybody think of the last time they've said that while trying to be serious?  I told my grandma about this and even she thought it was dated!  Anyways, I'll stop getting side tracked by my anger and continue with the blog.

Jessica Simpson announced her new fragrance today called I Fancy You and women 65+ just went nuts!  There's no real description of how the perfume smells but if I had to guess.  Anger, sweat, shame and regret would make up the base smell of it.  I mean if you slept with Johnny Knoxville you would be filled with an array of emotions consisting of the same effects.  The scent may even have some cookie dough and maybe even a hint of steak.  Yes, ladies if your man is a controlling, abusive, stupid  jerk that loves to stuff his face in a glutton manner, and make an ass of himself no matter the consequences, squirt a little of this on your neck and be ready for the full mount, followed by the posture up and end with ground and pound.  I am awesome!