As definitive proof that no good deed goes unpunished, an unidentified Oregon man in his 50s has contracted the plague after rescuing a mouse from the jaws of a cat. Gah! Next time, just let nature take its course, pal.
Morgellons disease is coming for you! It's an eerie illness that leaves patients with painful cuts or "lesions", gives them a feeling that bugs are actually crawling all over their body, and has them seeing colorful things poking through their skin. Sounds like something you want to avoid like the plague right? Well it's not going to be hard to avoid, because it isn't infectious and